Published May 7, 2024

Making friends in The Netherlands

Welcome to the vibrant Dutch social scene, a blend of traditional values and contemporary openness that forms the essence of life in the Netherlands. If you're moving to the land of windmills and tulips, you're probably wondering about the social norms, favourite pastimes, and how to forge connections that turn a new environment into home. This article explores Dutch social customs and provides essential tips for building friendships in the Netherlands.

Expectations of social life 

Adjusting to the Dutch social landscape, you'll quickly appreciate their strong emphasis on work-life balance. This commitment to personal time allows for deep engagement with friends, family, and the pursuit of individual interests.  

While the Dutch communication style — characterized by its directness — might initially surprise newcomers, it's crucial to recognize this as a reflection of the culture's value on honesty and clarity, not a sign of rudeness. In the Netherlands, this directness facilitates clear understanding and efficient interactions, setting the stage for meaningful connections.  

Leisure and pastimes 
When it comes to leisure, the Dutch have a desire for a variety of activities. Cycling is not just a mode of transport but a way of life here, offering a unique way to explore the city and countryside alike. The popularity of sports like football, hockey, and sailing speaks volumes about the active lifestyle embraced by the locals. Moreover, with a rich calendar of cultural events, from music festivals to art exhibitions, there’s always something new to experience.

Understanding the do’s and don’ts can significantly enhance your interaction with the Dutch for fostering positive relationships and blending seamlessly into the local community.  

Some important guidelines to navigate the social norms in the Netherlands:  

Punctuality 
Time is of the essence. Arriving on time for appointments, social gatherings, or work reflects respect for others’ schedules and is deeply appreciated. 

Personal space  
The Dutch value personal space. While interactions are friendly, maintaining a comfortable distance during conversations is common practice. 

Greetings  
Initial meetings often begin with a firm handshake, reflecting openness and respect. For friends, three cheek kisses (right-left-right) serve as a warm gesture of affection, usually among those with established familiarity. 

Announced visits 
Spontaneity in visits is not the norm. The Dutch culture highly regards personal planning and scheduled engagements. To ensure a warm welcome, it’s advisable to arrange visits in advance rather than arriving unannounced. 

Making new friends

Broadening your social circle can be a rewarding effort. Engaging in local community events or joining clubs and groups that align with your interests can pave the way to forming lasting friendships. Language exchange meetups not only help in improving your Dutch but also in  
meeting locals and expats alike who are keen on cultural exchange. 

Some practical insights to navigate the Dutch social life effectively: 

Adapting to Dutch directness 
Embrace the straightforward communication style. It might seem blunt at first, but it’s rooted in a culture of openness and efficiency. Being direct in return is appreciated and establishes clear understanding in social interactions. 

Planning social engagements 
The Dutch often schedule their social activities well in advance. It’s not unusual to book appointments or social gatherings weeks ahead, so don’t be taken aback by the structured social planning. This approach helps in managing the well-balanced Dutch lifestyle between work, personal time, and social engagements. 

Exploring local and expatriate communities 
Dive into activities that resonate with your interests. The Netherlands is home to numerous expat groups, hobby classes, and social clubs that welcome newcomers. Whether it's a sports team, a book club, or a cooking class, these gatherings are splendid activities to meet new people and integrate into the Dutch way of life.

Language learning
While the Dutch are proficient in English, learning the local language can significantly enrich your social experiences. It demonstrates your commitment to integrating into the Dutch culture and opens up more opportunities for meaningful interactions. 

The key to act socially Dutch

In conclusion, as you navigate the waters of Dutch social life, remember that the key to a rich social experience in the Netherlands lies in openness, willingness to adapt, and actively seeking out opportunities to engage with both the local and international communities. Embrace the direct and somewhat non-flexible culture, partake in local traditions, and before you know it, you will find yourself immersed in a social life as colourful and varied as the Dutch landscape itself...  
 
Welkom in Nederland!

RSH | Relocation and Immigration Services

This article was prepared in collaboration with RSH | Relocation and Immigration Services, a full-service Relocation, Immigration, and Home Finding agency with 35 years of in-house experience. RSH provides support to knowledge migrants, HR managers, recruiters, and expats in organizing immigration matters, moving to, and housing in the Netherlands.

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